How effective is your self-care routine, really?

This is the first time I’m discussing self-care on the podcast, and it’s something that I’m very excited to talk about!

What inspired me to talk about self-care routines in more detail is the fact that I think a lot of people practice self-care incorrectly. (Did I say it? Yes. I did.)

The Incorrect Way to Practice Self-Care

Here’s what I find happens with self-care: people only practice it and love themselves when they’ve either:

  • done something really good (and they treat self-care like its a reward) or
  • they’ve had a particularly bad day, a mental breakdown or burnout, etc

Let me tell you – that’s the wrong way to approach self-care! But I can see why it happens like that.

There’s this annoying, blaring stigma in the world that says if you practice self-care more often, you are being selfish or some kind of weakling.

NEWS FLASH: that isn’t the case!

The reality is that you need to practice self-care consistently if you want to avoid burnout or a breakdown of some type. Self-care is the KEY to that! If you avoid practicing self-care until you *really* need it, I can guarantee you that you’re setting yourself the wrong way.

So we need to avoid that, right?

There is a simple answer, though. It all lies in the glory of a self-care routine. *insert all the heart eye emojis*

I know that there a lot of people out in the world that are not routine oriented. In my opinion, I think that if you were to have just one routine in your life, it should be for self-care. (It’s that important, y’all!)

So let’s talk about how to make one that’s super effective. There’s 3 main things to remember!

Make Your Self-Care Routine VERY Personalized

I know what you might be thinking: “Sierra. DUH.”

It sounds obvious, doesn’t it?! Self-care literally has the word “self” in it, so why not make it personalized?

And yet, I see things ALL over the internet that recommend self-care routines that are made for one person in mind and wouldn’t work for a lot of people.

For example: have you ever seen those things on Pinterest that say “follow this whole spa day for an amazing start to your week”? That’s great and all, but what if you don’t even like spa days?!

I know I’m not a huge fan. Like yeah, I like baths. But I hate getting my nails done and I don’t really trust other people with my hair so how would a spa-day really help me?

It doesn’t. (Am I getting too sassy? I don’t know lol but we’re rolling with it.)

If you want your self-care to really be effective, it needs to be ALL about what makes you happy, what brightens your day, makes you laugh and relaxes you.

You could follow all the detailed self-care routines that are listed across the entire internet, but if they’re not *truly* helping you, what’s the point?

By the way…if you need *ideas* for some self-care, check out this blog post!

How to Make an Awesome Self-Care Routine

Embrace Your Quirks

I think one of the biggest things that the personalizing problem stems from is that a lot of us have fears and insecurities about what we really enjoy, and we’re afraid to be open about them and use them in our self-care.

Let’s be real: I think we all have a little bit a nerd inside us or something about us that’s super quirky. It’s time we embrace those things!

The reason why is because, often, the weird things that we love end up being the BEST forms of self-care.

Personally, I am a gigantic nerd! For a very long time, I tried to hide those things about myself. It ended up making me very unhappy. What was the point of hiding such a big part of myself?

Eventually, I finally embraced those nerdy qualities about myself and so many good things came out of it! I was able to be more real about what I enjoy and that made my self-care SO much better!

I’m telling you now: screw what anyone says. Don’t let your fear stop you from creating the most epic self-care routine you’ve ever known!

We can go through this process together, okay?

Let me share a bit of the nerdy things I like to do. If I can share it – so can you!

  • I like stickers. My planner gets decorated with them and it looks all cute and I feel like a 12 year old girl with it and I love it.
  • I listen to classical music for fun. It’s so relaxing and it also gives you MEGA boosts in concentration and productivity!
  • Marvel movies are my jam. I saw the midnight release of Avengers: End Game and it literally changed my life. #outuntil4am
  • I love googling random things to learn about them. If I find something even a little bit interesting, I dive into the deep, dark depths of the internet to learn more.
  • I’m a ginormous Potterhead. I’m a Ravenclaw. I have a Deathly Hallows tattoo. I’ve read the books 4 times.

And much much more, lol.

So for real: share your quirky side and embrace it. You’ll feel a million times better doing it!

Start Simple

I know that it’s super easy to create an amazing self-care routine and want to immediately dive in head first so you can immerse yourself with all of the self-love goodness.

But wait. Hold on *just* a second.

You need to take baby steps with this. If you change too many things about your routine (or lack thereof) at once, you WILL get overwhelmed and end up quitting before you’ve really started.

Self-care IS a very important thing, and you may want to make it a big part of your life ASAP because of that. However, it’s gonna end up going a lot better for you if you take it one step at a time.

Let’s say you want to start a morning self-care routine that includes drinking a glass of water first thing, reading a chapter and going for a run.

That’s great! But it might be pretty hard to do all 3 of those things at once without finding out quickly that you’re overdoing it.

Start with just the glass of water. Try that for a week. Once you have that down, then add the reading. Do that for another week or two. Then finally you add in your morning runs.

With that process, there’s more of a transition between where you were before to where you are headed with your new self-care routine.

The change you’re hoping to see with your self-care will happen sooner than you think if you take it step by step!

When you get overwhelmed, you just end up quitting and having to start over again and again. The slow process will make sure you don’t quit and you’ll be rocking your new routine real soon!

How to Make an Awesome Self-Care Routine

Go Easy on Yourself

This tip is SO important! The reality is that, even if you have started a good self-care routine, you could still miss some part of it.

And that’s okay! As much emphasis as I’m putting on self-care routines and structure around self-care, I also want you to know that it’s okay to not be perfect at it all the time.

Allow me to drop a truth bomb on you: part of self-care is self-forgiveness. (!!!)

If you can’t forgive yourself for missing a day of your routine (or a week or whatever) then your brain is still going to be in a negative space. And we all know that’s not the point!

Make sure you give yourself some grace. Absolutely no one in the world is perfect, and that includes you!

If you find your brain saying negative things to you when you miss your self-care or mess up, challenge it. Say, “No. It’s okay. I have tomorrow, AND I’m still a very whole, complete, amazing person even when my self-care game is a bit off.”

Repeat that sentence as needed, and I promise that eventually you’ll believe it. 🙂

If you struggle with self-care because depression is holding you back, get this free guide!

Exciting announcement…I’m writing an ebook!

This entire time, I’ve been talking about self-care, and the main reason is because I’m a big believer that self-care is a KEY aspect to you achieving happiness.

That’s what we all want, right? To be happy?!

And yet, I still see SO many people struggle with finding their joy because of anxiety and depression.

Let me tell you something, – happiness isn’t waiting for you at the end of your mental illness. You have to reach out and grab it for yourself! It’s your responsibility to bring happiness to you.

And that’s still your responsibility even when you have anxiety and depression.

The ebook I’m writing will tell you EXACTLY how you can do that.

I’m taking all the tools, techniques, mindset changes and more that I’ve used over the past few years to reach the coveted “happiness state” and I’m combining them all together into this amazing ebook.

I know that this ebook will *literally* transform lives. If you are interested in creating your own joy, and no longer worrying about mental illness holding you back, I want you to join the wait list.

The ebook will be launching on May 29th, but joining the wait list now will guarantee you exclusive access to the content, along with discount codes and extra special goodies that no one else will receive.

Seriously – if you’re ready to take your life to the next level, join the wait list here.

Until then, make sure you take some time for YOU today.

Sierra Mafield Blog